Everything feels numb and somehow too much at the same time.
I am useless to the world and everything around me.
I see no future ahead of me where I am truly happy, like how I once was.
It feels like there is justification in the pain you caused me, based off your actions.
I can’t stop crying about companionship I lost, even though I now have it back.
If I stopped reaching out, no one would notice my absence or disappearance.
Isolation will be the death of me.
me: i am so stupid… genuinely illiterate. i am the dumbest bitch alive
someone: you’re stupid
me: Einstein Wants What I Have
(via bunhed)
![artful-clumsiness:
“ c-itize-n:
“ takemetoalice:
“ c-itize-n:
“ 5 am thoughts / [x]
”
You took my thoughts and wrote them out.
”
aww
”
this. is. so. fuckin. true.
”](https://64.media.tumblr.com/3c6e57c604a40c14d366a4db55cb34e3/tumblr_n4jj73cahd1sx143xo1_400.jpg)
December 21, 9:44pm
A month ago I was fantasizing about going on Christmas break. I thought November was the worst month for me in 2017, I was most certainly wrong. Everything that has happened to me in the last few weeks has left me blindsided and empty. There is no comfort for me that I can find. I’ve tried everything. Now I am home on a “break”. It does not feel like one. I am still tirelessly working because my siblings don’t fo anything around the house. I now get to add verbal abuse to the weight of things I have to cope with. The negativity in this house is unbearable, but I have no where else to go. I wish I could talk to my mom, but I can’t bring myself to vocalize what is wrong, she already knows some of it, because she hears the way I am talked to… I don’t know, I can’t bring myself to it. The comfort I want I can not have. I feel so trapped, I can’t breath. If I could find my razors I would honestly just fucking relapse because there is no reason not to anymore.
